Discomfort During Intercourse While Pregnant

Pregnancy comes with aches and pains, and in some cases, they can seep into your sex life. Vaginal or pelvic pain can put your sex life on hold, especially if the pain is too much. Different factors can cause this pain. Thankfully, most of these can be resolved to bring your sex life back to where it was. 

Key Takeaways

• It’s totally safe in most cases to remain sexually active throughout pregnancy, although there will be times when intercourse is uncomfortable or painful while pregnant.
• Things like changing positions and experimenting with new types of foreplay and physical intimacy can help relieve discomfort in many cases.
• If you experience severe pain, bleeding, itching, and burning while urinating, contact a doctor right away to identify the cause and ensure it’s not something that could endanger you or the pregnancy.

What Causes Discomfort During Sex While Pregnant?

Pregnancy itself can be quite uncomfortable and for some women, this can get worse when sex is added into the mix. Your body is going through major physical changes; hormone levels are fluctuating and feelings about sex and intimacy can shift right along with them. While some forms of discomfort during sex are part of the pregnancy, other aches and pains can signal a serious issue that needs medical attention.

Anxiety

Pregnancy can make you anxious. You can be worried about the tiny one growing in your womb, nervous about your body and the changes it's going through, life after the baby comes, or a combination of all. This anxiety can make it difficult to focus on things that would have otherwise felt normal like sex.

A 2023 study showed that the pregnant partner’s sexual function can decrease when they are extremely anxious. The study found that these effects increased the closer the person got to the third trimester. This can be more pronounced if the pregnant partner struggled with infertility and conceived through assisted reproductive treatments.

If anxiety during pregnancy is having a serious effect on your life, sexually or otherwise, talk to your healthcare provider about strategies for addressing it. The compassionate healthcare professionals will walk with you and guide you on managing it and reducing its impact on your health and your pregnancy.

Increased Sensitivity

For some pregnant people, any form of touch can make them uncomfortable, making sex nearly impossible. This can likely be attributed to the rise in blood flow to the breasts, the pelvic region, and the reproductive organs in particular. Open communication with your partner during pregnancy is important. Let your partner know what you need at the moment, and if you’re overstimulated, try taking a break or slowing things down for a bit until you can get comfortable again.

Your Belly

The bigger your belly during pregnancy, the more uncomfortable you can get when trying to be intimate. Some sexual positions also become harder because of your growing belly, and it can take some time to find a rhythm. While sex is perfectly safe for the baby even in the weeks leading up to delivery, you can avoid positions that put an excessive amount of weight on your stomach. 

Hemorrhoids

Hemorrhoids, also known as piles, are swollen veins in the anus and lower rectum. They can be internal or external, forming under the skin around the anus. The National Institute of Health estimates that 25 to 35 percent of pregnant people will have hemorrhoids at some point during their pregnancy, particularly in the third trimester. Hemorrhoids can be extremely painful, making sex uncomfortable or impossible, depending on where they are located. In some cases, you may need to put off sex until they clear up.

Vaginal Dryness

As hormones fluctuate during pregnancy, your vagina’s ability to lubricate itself may reduce resulting in vaginal dryness. On the other hand, some women report excessive lubrication, which can also be quite uncomfortable. However, vaginal dryness impacts sex life more, preventing you from having sex as often as you’d like to. In that case, there are a wide variety of over-the-counter options available for lubricants and vaginal moisturizers, which can reduce discomfort during intercourse as well as in day-to-day life.

Infection

In some instances, pain during sex when pregnant can be an indication of an infection, and some infections can cause serious complications. These infections include:

• Urinary tract infection
• Yeast infections
• Bacterial vaginosis
• Sexually transmitted infections

The National Institute of Health states that infections are the cause of more than 10 percent of pregnancy-related deaths worldwide, with nearly 30 percent of these infections originating in the urinary tract.

For this reason, any itching or burning during sex or urination, pain in the lower back or around the kidneys, or urine that is cloudy or has a particularly strong smell, may indicate an infection that needs treatment. Most bladder infections can be cleared with a simple course of antibiotics, so it’s important to contact a healthcare professional swiftly to begin treatment early.

Ectopic Pregnancy

An ectopic pregnancy is a condition where a fertilized egg implants itself outside of the womb, typically in one of the fallopian tubes. If left untreated, an ectopic pregnancy can cause the fallopian tube to rupture, killing the pregnant parent.

Signs of an ectopic pregnancy include:

• Pelvic pain
• Vaginal bleeding
• Pain in the shoulders and neck in some cases.
• Unrelenting abdominal pain
• Discomfort when peeing
• Lightheadedness
• Fainting

If the fallopian tube ruptures, your life can be in danger. If you experience any of these symptoms and they do not go away, seek a healthcare professional immediately.

How to Manage Pain During or After Sex When Pregnant

Managing discomfort during sex starts with talking to your partner. You can let them know when you're feeling pain or are uncomfortable in any way. Other ways you can decrease pain and discomfort include:

• Changing Positions: Try different positions to reduce pressure on the stomach. Choose positions that can allow you to control the speed and intensity of intercourse. You can also take advantage of pillows to make certain positions easier or more comfortable. 
• Use Lubrication: Lubricant can go a long way to relieving discomfort caused by anxiety or vaginal dryness due to hormonal changes. Choose a water-based product and avoid any lubricants with scents to avoid getting a UTI. 
• Intimacy is broad: If sex is still painful, you can still enjoy intimacy with your partner by participating in mutual massages, oral sex, or masturbation. These may be less uncomfortable, and can still be a great way to grow closer to your partner during a challenging time.

Talk to a Doctor

In healthy pregnancies, sex is perfectly safe. However, when there’s any discomfort or pain during sex that doesn’t die down, it could be a sign of something more serious that needs to be addressed. If the pain is persistent or is accompanied by consistent bleeding, it’s time to talk to a healthcare professional.

Other signs like burning and itching while urinating and pain in the lower back or kidneys, should also prompt you to call a doctor. It's always better to be safe than sorry when it comes to your reproductive health while pregnant.

The Bottom Line

It’s possible to maintain a happy, consistent sex life throughout your pregnancy. Any pain or discomfort must be communicated to your partner. It’s also okay to stop during sex when you feel pain. It’s also critical to speak with your healthcare provider about any concerning signs you encounter. While many normal conditions can cause mild discomfort during sex when pregnant, intense discomfort or pain may require medical intervention.